I love horror films, but recently it seems like I can’t find one that doesn’t feature vampires. I’m actually putting a review for The King’s Speech on the back burner to write this review. While I love stuttering royalty as much as the next guy, the Academy Award winning film failed to scare me or make me jump once. There’s a gleeful simplicity in horror films. They’re movies about evolution; survival of the fittest and the smartest, even against overwhelming odds. That’s what I was look for and what I found.
The Crazies stars Timothy Olyphant as the sheriff of a small Iowa town. The citizens have little to worry about, maybe a mohawked poacher every now and then, but life is pretty simple. Then the townsfolk slowly start acting a little bizarre, repeating phrases and staring aimlessly at the stretching landscape. Then the crazy starts to creep through in murderous ways - the afflicted kill without remorse or discretion. Suddenly, the carefree sheriff is dealing with rising violence, sleepless nights, and mysterious black SUVs. It doesn’t take long for the situation to spin out of control and he’s left to defend his family against the hoards of psychotic denizens who had voted him into office.
One thing I’ve learned for horror movies: Don’t be stupid. The movie starts out so good. The sheriff doesn’t ever go anywhere without his gun drawn, he doesn’t wander blindly through the town, in fact, he seems to figure out what happening long before anyone else. Then he starts to get dumb. Now maybe it’s the pressure or the tiredness, but halfway through he movie he starts leaving his wife unattended while he goes and explores darkened buildings by himself. Sure he makes the usual mistakes, but if you can forgive the hero from falling prey to these standard horror film pitfalls you’ll still enjoy this movie.
A good horror movie can take some of the most pedestrian things and make them frightening. Like how Jaws made you afraid of the water, or Nightmare on Elm Street made you afraid to sleep, or I Know What You Did Last Summer made you afraid of running over hobos and dumping their bodies in the ocean. The Crazies takes car washes and makes them scary in the best way. I’ll never go to Jet Splash without thinking about this movie. I also have developed a fear of farming equipment. It seems that every farming tool is designed for the dismemberment and disemboweling of unsuspecting bystanders.
I started watching this movie because I wanted something light and fun. I was a little surprised to find I loved it; a horror gem. It’s not The Exorcist or 28 Days Later, but it’s good. If you’re a horror fan, you don’t want to miss this one. It can get a little graphic at times, but in the age of torture porn it’s pretty tame - there aren’t any drawn out, painful-to-watch kills; just a lot of tension and a lot of fun. The acting is solid, the directing is good and the story is engrossing. It makes me want to check out the original which is directed by George Romero (he produced the 2010 version.) Best part: it’s on Instant Netflix, so you can watch it this weekend. The only thing that The Crazies was missing. Vampires. Here’s hoping there’s a sequel.
Directed by: Breck Eisner
Starring: Timothy Olyphant, Radha Mitchell, and Joe Anderson
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